Communication Styles through the Lens of the Enneagram

Throughout my career, I have come to understand the power of listening to build effective leadership. Whether that was serving in a leadership role, coaching leaders, or supporting leaders through training.

About five years ago, I became a certified Conversational Intelligence coach, which gave me great insight into the neuroscience of conversations – what happens in our brains when we have quality conversations or conversations that get stuck. One fundamental aspect of communication is that understanding resides with the listener. Therefore, to create shared understanding, the speaker needs to have the skills to adjust their communication style so that the listener is receiving the information with the intended meaning.

It is not easy to adapt our communication style so that another person receives the information with our intended meaning. However, my recent training as an Enneagram Practitioner has introduced me to a new approach to exploring communication styles. The Enneagram is an ancient framework that examines personality through our core motivations to help explain why we are the way we are. Our core motivation drives how we engage with the world and others to meet our needs. 

The communication style of each leadership type is in service to the core motivation. With a deeper understanding of what is driving someone’s style, we can adjust our language to meet their needs to create a shared understanding.

Credit: www.withinsight.coach

Understanding the nine communication styles through the Enneagram framework provides a roadmap to adapt our auto-pilot style to align with the listener. The first step in this process is understanding your style, core motivation and how that influences your communication. With that as a foundation, you can move to understanding other styles and interpersonal communication dynamics. 

To learn more about the Enneagram and how it can support you as a leader, check out the Minutes with Mary Enneagram Podcast Mini-Series. Episode 20: explores the Enneagram and Communication.

To begin your Enneagram journey, explore the resources and services Vista Global offers.

What is your “Y”?

In 2009, Simon Sinek, leadership and innovation thought leader, delivered a revolutionary Tedx talk on the golden circle.The framework is 3 concentric circles starting with WHY at the center, then HOW and finally WHAT.  His Tedx talk has more than 65 million views and inspired a movement for leaders in all walks of life to examine their true purpose, the impact they want to have in the world and then align their work with that desired vision. 

This concept of your “Why” is one of the fundamental principles of leadership coaching, often called “life purpose” or “compelling purpose”. What do you want your life to be about? How does your work align with your values?  When your work aligns with your values, you are living your fullest life with the greatest level of impact.

There is a Japanese concept called ikigai which is a concept referring to something that gives a person a sense of purpose, reason for being.

My WHY is driven by my values of connection, equity, positivity, and diversity. These values drive the type of clients Vista Global engages with and the organizations I invest my time and resources in supporting.

I am excited to share that I recently joined the board of the YWCA Madison. The YWCA is on a mission to eliminate racism and empower women. It is often confused with the YMCA, yet the mission of the YWCA is distinct and transformative. The YWCA Madison’s values are Humanity, Community, Growth and Restoration.  The “WHY” of the “Y” deeply aligns with my “why” and therefore I am thrilled to have the opportunity to support their impact in creating the world we want to live in.

If your “WHY” aligns with the mission of the “Y”, consider contributing to the YWCA Madison or a YWCA near you.

2024 Mini-Sabbatical: Back on the Island

Photo Credit: Kailua-Kona, Hawaii, Mary Stelletello

Photo Credit: Keahou, Hawaii, Mary Stelletello

It is that time of year again…when I do my annual mini-sabbatical. November is a time of transition. In the U.S. we turn the clocks back an hour, the days seem to be getting shorter more quickly and the sun is lower in the sky.

I was able to take my annual planning retreat/mini-sabbatical on the Big
Island of Hawaii this year. Since I have been there many times, it is familiar and I don’t have an urge to go exploring..well not too much.

It is my time to do the activities that bring my ENERGY, like play tennis, run, float in the ocean, watch sunsets and rainbows. This year I ran in the
Kona Coffee Cultural Festival 5K that happened to take place while I was on island. A great way to connect with
energy and community.

It is my time to connect with COMMUNITY, see
old friends and make new friends. I spent the day with a dear friend I journeyed through coach training with beginning in 2009 and she introduced me to one of her close friends who lives life fully.

It is my time to try out some new ways of tapping
into different paths of
CREATIVITY. Earlier this year, I attended a webinar series offered by Leadership Learning Community series on liberatory practices. One session was called The Art of Repair, where we learned the practice of Sashiko. I had my kit and finally gave myself the space to play with it.

It is my time to READ things that I have had sitting on my desk or bedside table all year. I have been following Valarie Kaur for several years. She wrote See No Stranger and just released her new book called Sage Warrior which explores the question:  “How do we find the wisdom to envision a new world and the courage to fight for it?”

It is also my time to REFLECT on business goals for the current year and make plans for the coming year. In 2024, we built some new programming, launched a series of Enneagram Offerings. It is a significant body of work and I am proud of what we created in partnership with Jayson Morris of WITHINSIGHTS

As I thought about 2025, what became clear is that Vista Global has done a lot of work with many incredible organizations and I could do a better job staying in touch. Therefore, my primary goal for 2025 is to RECONNECT with past clients to just see how you are doing. What is new? What do you want to celebrate? What are your challenges?  If you are a recent client and you haven’t heard from me in a while, don’t be surprised if you see a note from me in the near future.

I am looking forward to celebrating the work you do to make the world a better place. I’ll be in touch soon!

The Enneagram in the Global Context

Guest Blog by Jayson Morris, PCC 

A year ago, one of my former work associates emailed me with a fascinating and daunting proposition. Having just become a certified integral coach, she left her career in international philanthropy to create a new leadership development program for nonprofit leaders in East Africa. A native Kenyan herself, her newfound passion was to prove to funders that a nine-month coaching intervention would catalyze stronger grassroots leaders and build more effective teams. And she wanted to partner with me to kick off their programming with the Enneagram to enhance their self-awareness.

Having seen the power of the Enneagram with my coaching clients over the past few years, I was thrilled with the opportunity to work with leaders from some of the global south countries I had served as a nonprofit and philanthropic leader. And I was nervous that I would fail.

“The Enneagram works effectively across cultures because it looks inside at our core motivations and fears” is what I had been taught. If you do not focus on behaviors but instead on each person’s inner world, the model and the nine types will hold true. But would they?

A year and 90 leaders across three countries later, I can confidently say the Enneagram works across cultures. However, it requires the practitioner to stay curious and avoid the temptation to type others based on behavior. It also necessitates some cultural understanding to help translate aspects of the type to the cultural context.

For example, the Type 8, often known as The Challenger for their bold assertiveness, comfort with confrontation, and with anger as an emotion, will look very different in a U.S. context versus in Uganda. The level of overt assertiveness in the Ugandan Type 8 will be more muted than their American counterpart, but they will appear the most assertive type within the Ugandan context.

It all came together when a fellow consultant introduced me to Erin Meyer’s Culture Map work.

The graphic shows the difference between U.S. and Ugandan culture across seven themes.

Photo Credit: Erin Meyer

If we zoom in on DISAGREEING, we notice that the U.S. has a significantly more confrontational culture than Uganda. 

As the type most comfortable with confrontation, the Type 8 American (blue) sits much further on the side of overt confrontation than their Ugandan counterpart (yellow). [Note positioning is not exact but rather is an illustrative comparison).

Therefore, how they look and sound in the office will be different, but relative to the other types and to their culture they will be the most comfortable with confrontation.

Similarly with all other eight Enneagram types, we must spend time understanding the inner world and the culturally appropriate expressions of motivations and strategies to help people find their type. My favorite moment was conducting a debrief with an Enneagram Type 2 (known as The Helper) who did not like the term ‘seduction’ that is often used in describing one of the strategies certain Type 2s use. ‘Seduction’ in this day and age, particularly in U.S. culture or one that is influenced by U.S. media, has a strong sexual connotation. However, in its purest form, it means “to win over; attract; entice.” When I explained this, she lit up and said: “So you mean that if I come into the office every morning one week and say hello to a colleague, knowing that at the end of the week, I am going to need to ask them for help…”  BINGO!  We had a good laugh. 

One of the things I most love about the Enneagram is what makes it challenging to facilitate and dangerous for the uneducated to use, but also what makes it a globally powerful tool: it’s not the behaviors you observe that tell you about someone’s type, it’s what’s happening on the inside. It’s the core motivation, fears, and patterns of thinking, feeling, and acting that matter most. 

Jayson Morris is an executive coach and leadership facilitator working with leaders and rising talent in the corporate, nonprofit and philanthropy space all around the world. He is ICF PCC certified and holds Enneagram Certifications from two world renown Enneagram training institutes – Integrative Enneagram Solutions and Chestnut Paes Enneagram Academy. He also studied with the Enneagram Prison Project and The Narrative Tradition. You can find Jayson at www.linkedin.com/in/jayson-morris/ or at WithInsight Coaching  www.withinsight.coach 

Blog Series:

The Enneagram: Connecting Ancient Wisdom to Global Transformation

The Enneagram and Neuroscience: Growing New Neural Pathways

The Enneagram: Nine Points of View and Core Motivation

Creating a Championship Team with the Enneagram

The Enneagram in The Global Context

Discover the Power of the Enneagram: Join Our May Celebration

Do you ever feel like you’re operating on autopilot, trapped in patterns and habits that hold you back from being your best self? What if you had a powerful tool to gain deep self-awareness and break free from those limitations?

In celebration of World Enneagram Day on May 25, Mary Stelletello, founder of Vista Global and certified Enneagram Coach is excited to partner with Jayson Morris, a certified Enneagram Coach and Founder of WITHINSIGHT Coaching. Together, we will explore the power of the Enneagram to help you learn more about who you are and how you can break free of patterns, to move toward a life that is more purposeful, effective, and fulfilling. 

The Enneagram is a rich framework for individuals, teams, and organizations, so just one day of celebration is not enough. Therefore, over the month of May 2024, we are offering a variety of opportunities to explore the Enneagram in depth, including blogs, podcasts, and a special Enneagram Personal Discovery Package that includes an individual assessment, live debrief session, and introductory workshop. For those who want to explore further, there will be more workshops offered later this summer. 

What is the Enneagram?

The Enneagram personality-type map offers an expansive journey into the nine core types of individuals and what internally motivates them. Discovering our type can provide realizations of the strengths we take for granted and the challenges that arise from over-utilizing particular strengths and strategies. It can provide insights into why people communicate differently and why they overemphasize thinking, feeling, or action at the expense of the other two types of intelligence. It offers understanding of different views of work/life success, how each type is activated, and the differing ways people react to tension and conflict.

This discovery offers opportunities for new ways of engaging with ourselves, our colleagues, and the world at large. We can break free from unconscious ways of doing things and can learn new, more effective alternatives. It creates the possibility that other people’s ways of working are not wrong, just different and perhaps more effective than our own. Exposure to other viewpoints can lead to a newfound curiosity and an openness to tapping into the innate strengths of others for the success of the team. The net result can be new ways of relating to self and others in the workplace, resulting in enhanced effectiveness.

Celebrating the Enneagram throughout May

To celebrate World Enneagram Day, we have created a line-up of activities to introduce this powerful framework:

May 8: Minutes with Mary & Jayson Episode 1: Our Enneagram Journey and an Introduction to the Framework

May 15: Minutes with Mary & Jayson Episode 2: The Enneagram and Communication

May 21: Minutes with Mary & Jayson Episode 3: The Enneagram and Navigating Conflict 

May 22 10am PT/1pm ET: 45-minute FREE Discover the Power of the Enneagram webinar

This free 45-minute session will provide a deep dive into the Enneagram framework. During the webinar, you will take a free micro test to identify your type and gain insight into all nine types. Learn how the Enneagram can help you move toward a life that is more purposeful, effective, and fulfilling.

We are also offering a World Enneagram Day Personal Discovery Package for those who want to take a deep dive in exploring your personal Enneagram type and what it can offer, including:

This package provides the opportunity to discover your Enneagram type along with its associated strengths, challenges, blind spots, and areas for development. Beyond just the assessment and a 20-page report, you will have the opportunity to work with a certified Enneagram coach to confirm your Enneagram type, address questions or aspects of the report that do not resonate, and begin charting your growth path. From there, you will join other Enneagram Explorers for an interactive workshop to deepen your understanding of the framework and learn about all 9 Enneagram Types.  

During the month of May, we will offer the package for $250, a 50% discount off the regular price!

We look forward to seeing you this month!

For more information about the Enneagram, check out the Vista Global Blog Series

Blog Series

The Enneagram: Connecting Ancient Wisdom to Global Transformation

The Enneagram: Nine Points of View and Core Motivation

The Enneagram and Neuroscience: Growing New Neural Pathways

Creating a Championship Team with the Enneagram

Magic Money: Financial Innovation and Impact Investing with WeTheChange

Since launching in 2018, Vista Global has been a dedicated member of WeTheChange, a community actively working towards an equitable and just economy for all. 

The WeTheChange declaration, crafted by women CEOs of Certified B Corporations and other purpose-driven enterprises, fosters collaboration and commitment to our shared values and principles. Signatories of this declaration personally, and on behalf of their companies, pledge to uphold these ideals, reflecting our core values and the B Corporation community’s commitment to the highest standards of social and environmental performance, transparency, and accountability.

WeTheChange hosts monthly member meetings, focusing on topics that align with our mission. Our Spring 2024 offering introduces the Impact Finance Center “Magic Money: Financial Innovation and Impact Investing” learning series. The Impact Finance Center is on a mission to channel $1 trillion into social ventures by leveraging the successful model pioneered in Colorado. It aims to transform interested individuals and organizations into impact investors, while also building community platforms like Impact Days and the Impact Investing Institute, to foster a vibrant ecosystem for financial innovation.

In the April 24th meeting, Dr. Stephanie Gripne will interview Colleen LaFontaine, who has extensive experience with The Women’s Foundation of Colorado, to discuss the practical use of impact investing tools for profit maximization. To finish the series on May 29th, Dr. Gripne will conduct a 90-minute session on reenvisioning your business’s financial strategies.

Become part of the innovative WeTheChange community as a Collaborator, Changemaker, or Catalyst by visiting WeTheChange Membership, where you’ll gain full access to our insightful monthly meetings.

If you’re not ready to commit to membership, you can still attend each meeting by registering for a one-time fee of $25. To register for the April 24 meeting click here. To register for the May 29 meeting click here.

Together, let’s forge a path towards a just and equitable economy, empowering women-led businesses and communities that drive  meaningful impact.